The other day I was driving in my car and speaking to the Lord. I had forgotten my phone so my never-ending supply of sermon podcasts and music playlist were not available to distract me from a conversation with God. I was really frustrated with everything! Have you ever been in that type of “funk?” I just didn’t seem to be getting it right in any aspect of my life: spiritual walk, parenting, being a wife, my job… Misery loves company so the list went on and on with self-fault finding. I was in a slump. And this feeling permeated my entire conversation with God. I apologized for not living up to His potential inside of me. For not agressively pursuing the purpose He had for me. How I had made poor choices and went down the wrong road at times. When he clearly directed me left, I went right. And now I was dealing with those consequences. I listed for him my failures and shortcomings. So by the time I got home, I felt really dejected and down on myself.
What’s interesting is that night I had an amazing dream.
I was in a valley. This was a beautiful valley that produced a lot of good things. It was my valley. Suddenly, I learned of a threat: an “enemy” wanted my valley and would flood it with water, ruining everything. I felt panic, anger, and fear.
But almost immediately, I was told that a solution had been found! I was brought to a structure. It was a building made entirely of brick. It was a one room structure and went from the ground to as far up as I could see. It was like a high tower in the middle of my valley. Inside was nothing – but me. And suddenly I heard the voice of God say, “Look at my beautiful bride.” I quickly looked around the room to see his beautiful bride. But I didn’t see anything. I got so frustrated because I wanted to see God’s beautiful bride! But no one else was there!
When I woke up, I was bothered by that dream. I thought maybe due to my “unworthiness”, God didn’t let me see His beautiful bride. So I prayed and asked God to reveal the dream to me. And He did! He said that even in the valley, when the threat of total annihilation is imminent, He is there. He is my strong tower and fortress that protects me! That’s why I was in a tall brick structure. But I still didn’t get the meaning of the bride. What did that mean?? He then revealed to me that I was the beautiful bride. That no matter what I think of myself with all my shortcomings and failures, all He sees is beauty!!!
I’m His beautiful bride.
I felt so humble and blessed that after such a depressing day, He took the time to speak to me in a dream!!!
Let’s make a commitment today to look at ourselves as God sees us. The enemy will try to deceive you into thinking you are unworthy, worthless, a complete mess-up. This keeps you in a debilitating state, where you are not walking in the purpose and plan for your life.
When you start to feel down about yourself, go to every word and promise God has spoken about you! Start with Psalm 139. Remember we are a chosen generation, a holy nation, adopted and grafted into God’s family, a royal priesthood, God’s special treasure, His special possession.
When we look at ourselves through the lens of God, we are so astonishingly beautiful: scars, brokeness, failures, shortcomings, and all. We are His beautiful bride whom He loves and adores! God doesn’t love us because of (insert any noble act of service you feel you need to commit before God can truly love you) …
In reality, HE LOVES US IN SPITE OF ….